Aaron Houston at MPP is supposed to be this badass lobbyist (I heard he could recognize every single member of Congress and he even got to be on The Colbert Report), but the story tips he sends me are never anything important. It's always some crazy stuff like this:
This sounds like a horrible place. The soil is contaminated from chemical weapons testing. They have bison (which are not cows. They will kick your ass). And there's free weed, but it sucks.
It's like the island from Lost. They should do a movie about this, where some hippies hear there's pot growing on a secret army base, so they sneak in there and then get terrorized by insane radioactive buffaloes that get you stoned when they burp.
COMMERCE CITY, Colo. (CBS) Military marijuana? The U.S. Army planned to cover a chemical weapons site with grass and weed – but not the kind of grass and weed that's actually cropping up – the kind that's illegal.
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The military blames the supplier for the snafu, saying the mulch for ground cover was purchased from a place in Kansas where the low-grade weed is common.
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The Army made the first discovery of hemp on the property in June. So far they've picked about 100 plants that Scharmin says are low-grade. He says they plan to mow, burn or maybe even have bison eat the rest.
"Fish and Wildlife Service does not seem to have any concern about having bison out there," Scharmin says.
This sounds like a horrible place. The soil is contaminated from chemical weapons testing. They have bison (which are not cows. They will kick your ass). And there's free weed, but it sucks.
It's like the island from Lost. They should do a movie about this, where some hippies hear there's pot growing on a secret army base, so they sneak in there and then get terrorized by insane radioactive buffaloes that get you stoned when they burp.
Looking for the easiest way to join the anti-drug war movement? You've found it!
hemp bioremediation
hemp bioremediation
Funny!
That last paragraph was prime SNL material!
Priceless Fodder...
Yeah, i thought of the cult movie 'night of the lupine' (giant radioactive rabbits) turned carnivores!
radioactive buffalos
First, buffalo and bison are not the same thing. American bison are only distantly related to buffaloes. Second, the plural of buffalo is buffaloes, not buffalos.
Re: radioactive buffalos
You're right about the spelling, but it's ok to call them buffalo. According to wikipedia "The American Bison (Bison bison) is a North American species of bison, also commonly known as the American Buffalo."
oh noes
Guess we should nuke Kansas so the terrorists don't get their hands on that evil drug.
On the hoof
It sounds like a bunch of bull to me. I sent the last paragraph to my agent!
I used to work there and
I used to work there and there is hemp growing out of the soil. Too bad it is "ditch Weed" and too bad that everyone that works there is subject to random testing. However, there isn't any radioactive contamination they didn't build "nukes" there......just chemical stuff so anything growing is probably nasty anyway!
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